The foundation of my approach is an understanding of the challenge facing modern lovers. On the whole, we are wanting more from our relationships than any other time in human history. We still want the stability and comfort afforded by traditional marriages, but we now also crave emotional intimacy, intellectual stimulation, passionate sex, and spiritual connection…on into our golden years! Unfortunately, most of us are still operating under the rules that worked (or didn’t) for our parents and grandparents. We need a brand new set of skills to match our lofty vision.
In light of this, I see myself as an emissary for a radically new kind of relationship, the intimate relationship. I believe intimacy is our birthright as humans, and that we do best when living in authentic connection. I also believe that being torn from this natural state is the single greatest environmental contribution to psychiatric and behavioral disorders. As a result, for me therapy is equal parts recovery and discovery. It is the reclaiming of parts that were lost, sometimes decades ago, as well as the uncovering of something new entirely.
The relationship you want is not out of reach, but neither is it for the faint of heart. I value growth over comfort, and I hold my clients to a high standard. If you work with me, I’ll be asking a lot of you, but it’s not just because that’s what I think you need. It is, without a doubt, what I think you deserve.
I am trained in a variety of modalities that I integrate to create the best treatment plan for your relationship. These include Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), Relational Life Therapy (RLT), Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy (PACT), and Gottman Couples Counseling. I also draw on somatic psychology, spiritual psychology, attachment research, polyvagal theory, trauma theory, multiculturalism, depth psychology, feminist psychology, and gender studies.
Thinking of tying the knot? I help couples solve practical problems while creating a unique vision for married life.
Was your trust broken by a betrayal or affair? I help individuals and couples weather some of their toughest storms.
Sexual Intimacy Counseling
Whether you have a specific issue with a partner or just want to explore sexual concerns with a trusted professional, I can help.
Trauma, Grief, & Loss
When loving together, losing together is inevitable. I help couples hold fast in the aftermath of life’s greatest challenges.
If you would like to set up a free initial face-to-face consultation to see if we might be a good fit for counseling work together, please submit the form below. It may take up to 2 business days for a response. Thank you! -Hayden